variation of the spleen (again)

This spleen even in hapiness that never leave me
Forever, I guess, it will be part of me
This state of mind like a light rain at night
Like this beautifull paint with something not right

Ain't it funny that joy can be found in tears
That sometimes, the best way to smile is being stoic
From that deep place where no light ever shine
The biggest ray of sun can emane

Living body in a world not mine
For a head living in a time not now
Heart trapped in between those two
How can you ever feel not blue

Big high's for big low's
No middle for it's worthless
Being stable is not for me
I am born to be extreme

Quiet night of sleepless tought
Loud day's of sleeping conscience
I live in my head
In this spleen that make me beat